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The Angry Cincinnati Offensive Line Hating God Strikes Again

If you didn't know before now that the Bearcats are stricken with an angry and vengeful god with a very particular deity who loves nothing more than the smash the largest and strongest Bearcats in their most fragile spots now you know.

By Matt Opper
Greg Bartram-USA TODAY Sports

Look at what she* hath wrought in the last 14 months.

*I am guessing she, tho it could be he or it. Really, I am open to suggestions.

-- August 2013: Starting Center dan Sprague goes down for the 2013 season with a knee injury forcing the Bearcats to turn to Deyshawn Bond, a then unknown commodity.

-- September 2013 Austen Bujnoch breaks a bone in his foot. Buj would keep playing on it for a couple of weeks before he missed three games out of four starting with the Temple game. Bujnoch would start the last two games of the 2013 season.

-- October 2013 primary backup Kevin Schloemer is lost for the year when he has surgery following the SMU game

-- December 2013 Sam Longo breaks a bone in his foot against Louisville.

-- Mid December 2013 Longo and Bujnoch have surgeries which knock them out of the Belk Bowl forcing the Bearcats to start a brand new combination up front against the Tar Heels

-- January 2014 Eric Lefeld undergoes a surgery that would keep him out of the first part of spring practice

-- March 2014 Parker Ehringer undergoes a surgery to his (wait for it) foot and misses the rest of spring practice

-- Fall Camp 2014 Kevin Schloemer picks up an nagging injury which keeps him out for about a week

-- Toledo Game Deyshawn Bond suffers a knee sprain in the first half against the Rockets. Bond has yet to return to action. Cory Keebler also suffers an injury very late in that game

-- Miami Game Bond and Keebler are out. Dominic Mainello starts at center, Justin Murray at right tackle

-- Ohio State Week Kevin Schloemer is injured in practice and did not travel to Columbus. Bond is not ruled out for the Buckeyes.

-- Ohio State Game Bond is formally ruled out, Bearcats have their third different starting combination with Lefeld, Tyreek Burwell, Mainello, Ehringer, Keebler. Cory Keelber had a bad time.

So, here the Bearcats are, laid low by the Angry Cincinnati Offensive Line Hating God once again. Tom Groeschen of the Enquirer had this gem.

UC could also wind up burning the red shirts of some of their freshmen. I am thinking Jamerez Bownen would be a likely candidate among the freshman, but it could be anyone. So if you, or someone you know happens to be 6'3" or greater and 280 pounds or greater, are currently enrolled in the University of Cincinnati with eligibility to burn the Bearcats could really need you. Just let them know that they are risking the wrath of ACOLHG by signing up for this.

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